How did God become my all? It happened over time. I did not know that He was my all. It did not occur to me that He was. The fact is, He was always my all; but I did not always recognize that He was.
At one point, God was not even a “habit.” I grew up having to attend church every Sunday. That was non-negotiable. So much so that I was sure that we were missing out on some “good” things. It had to be more than school, work, and church. So, I tried to find more in the world to satisfy my curiosity. Church was boring; school was boring, and work was boring – those were my thoughts.
I will not bore you, now of the many things that caused my change. What is important for now, is “God is not my habit – He is my All.”
He is the first thing that I think of the morning; all during the night, I get to talk with Him. In the evenings, we share moments before I close my eyes. During the day, I think of Him. When did He become so important to me? When did my thoughts of Him matter so much? I guess it was at some point that I realize that I cannot function one minute without Him.
There is no air that man can create. The blood and cells in my body are not created by man. Man did not create my senses: sight, smell, taste, touch, hear or speech. God sees and knows all things. In the midnight, it is God who is my counsel, my physician, my father.
There is no place that I can hide or escape that He cannot find me. No wonder, David, wrote (Psalm 9:1-2), “I will praise you, O, Lord, with my whole heart. I will show forth your marvelous works. I will be glad and rejoice in you; I will sing praise to your name, O, thou, who is most High.”
He could have departed from me and left me in a terrible place; but He did not. The idea that I put my trust in things that were not good for me; that I relied upon things that were meant to hurt me; yet He saved me. His mercy is undeniable. His love is like no other.
For every moment that I am blessed to praise Him, to thank Him and ask for His help, it is not out of habit, but it is because He is my all.